Post of retirement

A post to signal the end of the blogging for this website.

A blogsite which contains quite a number of my thoughts explicitly so explicit that I shudder at what the capability of my thoughts.

The journey of life will continue regardless.

Please bear with me

People abuse drugs, people abuse alcohol, and some people abuse other people.

I may have been abusive too. To myself, that is.

Career... Financial supplements... Financial commitments...

Not to mention old injuries sustained in the past because I am not taking good care of myself. Not to mention alcoholism which left me doubting my liver's condition.
Not to mention new injuries as worse as back injury.
Not to mention that my daily diet is way off the regular charts because of work.

Body, body, please bear with me. I need you to function at more than 100%.

P.S. to body: I wanna live till end of the world.

Life

We have so many people out there wondering what is life.

There is one pedagogy which encourages teachers to use daily examples to teach students. How about this then?

What is life for living things? (Let's use a lion in the wild for comparison)

1. You can relate it to you being born, then growing. (That's when cubs are there as well.)
2. As you grow, you will learn the skills and knowledge so that you can get a job and you will work to feed yourself and your family too. (Cubs learn to hunt as they grow. In the end, they will have to hunt for food. Failure to do so will lead to death.)
3. School, society, country can be equated to animals being in packs, just whether it is small or big.
4. Rules for school, laws for society and country can be equated to the pack leader enforcing order in its pack, or there will be chaos.
5. Friendship is a tool we use to find people to be close with, to care about. Friends are people we can get along with. (Animals have to choose the members for their packs. And the members have to get along with each other.)
6. Love is a tool we choose our mates. (Animals choose their mates.)
7. We all die, including the animals.

So maybe, if you look it this way, we are far more advanced and developed than animals. Then again, there's not much difference if we look at the basics.

So what if we get recognition and satisfaction? Time will erase it eventually. Fundamentally, we are preparing ourselves so that the human race will live on.

The Orge's Choice

Fantasy story writers love to use this metaphor - the Orge's choice. To die fast or to die slow, where either way will be to die.

The old man is unwanted. His physical presence is not wanted in his home, being a ghost at home.

The only time his presence is felt will be when the money rolls in. Then after the less than 1 minute internet transaction, he is back as an unseen ghost.

Yet the people living in the house are not satisfied. Now they want to rid the house of the ghost and yet still want the transactions.

Too bad for them, the ghost may continue to 'haunt' them at least for 8 more years, till it has become stronger to move and find a new haunting while still giving them the transactions.

Ganbatte for 8 years!

Weak...

Quote of the day: If you love something, let it go. It will fly off and never return. - Murphy's Law of Love
Being a believer of Murphy's laws, I might say that the law of love can be true in some aspects. Here's one aspect.

Humans are flawed. Characters are flawed. Judgement is flawed. Cognitive thinking is flawed. Feelings are flawed. There is no perfect being.

So all of the above mentioned will only lead to flawed companionship, flawed interpretation, flawed decision making, and flawed influence be it emotional or cognitive.

If you love something so badly, you may want to see the best in the person in future. Yet you will not want to jeopardise it, because you are flawed, so you have to let go.

True to some extent...

Blue Sky

Sighing, the old man drew in a breath. His eyes had long been closed to the sight of beauty, for he knew he was back in his dready world, a world where promises, hopes and dreams were gibberish.

Yet through the courtesy of a passerby, the old man's eyes fluttered briefly. What he had thought impossible to capture, it was captured in the artpiece of the clear blue sky, where one would cast aside his worries or doubts for a brief moment.

The moment, no matter how brief, was appreciated. The old man now proceeds to search for a path only he can walk.

Passing over...

An old man in his rocking chair... His failing eyes staring into the blank space where the fire has gone out in the fireplace long ago... His withered parched face wrinkled in a smile... as he reminisced about his past...

He has forgotten about the painful, sorrowful, regretful times. He has his eyes only on the happy moments where the devil cannot reach him. He recalls the happiness which was at its truest form at their moments, not tainted by any aftermath.

He remembers the musical voices when they were filled with love, not tainted by the harsh reality that followed. He remembers those times with fondness and ached that they could not be realised.

The devil comes... Let him come... He will use these as his shield. He will use his honed experience through pain and regret as his spear. He still has one last battle and he will live on to witness the future...

Hamala

High Ability Mixed Ability. Low Ability. There are these classifications. Ever since the existence of science, people just have to define everything.
Yet the definitions help. In this society where communications are the fundamental blocks for relationships between people, it will be a major issue when people do not understand each other. There are various factors but one factor may be the complexity of thinking one has. Words have a lot of different meanings, and when used in different contexts, more interpretations will arise, resulting in misunderstandings.
Some misunderstandings are unavoidable, some minor. Yet some are so persistent and consistent, that one may realise that maybe communication has broken down even when there is talking.
Some people may assume that it is because of the different level of thinking between two parties, but personally, I will feel that this type of misunderstanding happens when two people of different mindsets refuse to put down the biaseness of their individual mindsets.There is no one who can say this is a tragedy. People have their reasons to believe in what they think. My question will be: do you really believe in the way of thinking which will benefit you all the way, even into the far future? Or do you know at you will change your mindset later? It is painful to find out that the mindset which one has would push another person away when that very mindset will be changed in the future.

Fate

I have never liked this word. If I had followed fate, I will still be homeless and in the line of customer services. I could have used fate as an excuse to alleviate my shortcomings and failures. I could have used fate to explain everythimg and anything in my life.
No, I know very well for myself that I have difficulty becoming the majority. It is my character that always questions.
I prefer to think it in a way that I am in charge of myself so that I will not run from the consequences of the choices I made. And I will bear whatever regret or sorrow I may have to face.
Do not forget that choices are made by yourself. Fate does not choose for you. Some chose the easiest way out and brushed it aside as fate. It only shows that the decision is not as important as you think it will be.

Are you a friendly person?

Some people have all the good comments like ''Oh, you are such a wonderful person. You can be a friend to anyone.''
That might be the truth if you put it positively. If you really think about it, you will be wondering. Firstly, is the person who said this biased? Secondly, is the group of friends you have around you really diversified in their ways of thinking?
Well, just one point to contradict all I have said will be what may matter most is that you and your friends are happy together. Then again, someone may be bound to think more about this.

Social Circle

I have seriously lost touch with the reality out there in the society. I have only miring about in my world as well as the world of fiction I attempted to write.
When I am finally in the right mindset to socialise now, I realise that the world has moved on without me. I am not bitter about this. After all, time waits for none. This gave me an insight that no one is really very important in the flow of time. If you happen to remove yourself from the flow, people around you will still move on or another substitute will take your place.
It is just a matter of time.

Dark thoughts...

Narcissistic
I saw this word on the board of a previous English class. I was deeply amused. Even it might be for creative class, this word is hardly applicable for primary school level. I must admit that I am quite poorly versed in English to know this word just recently as well.
The reason why I said it is not widely used might be the very definition of the word itself. Narcissism: 1. Excessive love or admiration of oneself 2. A psychological condition characterised by self preoccupation, lack of empathy, and unconcious deficits in self esteem 3. Erotic pleasure derived from contemplation or admiration of one's own body or self 4. The attribute of the human psyche characterised by admiration of oneself but within normal limits. From American Heritage Dictionary
Now there are quite a lot of rationale why the word 'fuck' is not taught in schools. Generally, we can say that it is a word which emanates negativity. So if 'fuck' is frowned upon, isn't narcissism should be also treated the same by its definitions?
Something to be thought about...

Putting all eggs in a basket
Ancient wise men had this saying on top of the values they tried to cultivate into the society.
I am not one of them. My interpretation can be as follow:
1. Always have a backup plan
2. Do not put all hopes in one aspect
I have my share of disappointment when I thought I could have entertainment today for at least once in this week, since the rest of the week is just so mundane with work. Unfortunately, it was not realised because of lack of time and time management. Next time, I really have to go along with a better organiser.
Anyway, the talk of the day is about the meaning behind the saying.
I find this saying especially contradicting in the aspect of values, friendship, love and other aspects. Should we place all our hopes and expectations in these aspects or should we reserve some of our feelings back? If we reserve, there will be no complete trust. And do we really have all the evidence to be able to believe?
Seeing is believing. Belief also stems from perspective of the individual. Our belief may be based on incomplete information we gathered. A good example will be how well do I know a person based on the limited time of interaction. So are we believing a universal truth or truth as believed by a large majority of people.
A thought to darken your day.